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Shaking the sting away

Greetings from my queen-sized bed!

Once again, late pregnancy has brought me to the land of oligohydramnios—the fancy-pants way to say “low amnionic fluid.” Nobody knows why my body or my babies suddenly decide to replicate The Sahara inside, but this is my fifth time battling it away. This past Tuesday, I had a […]

How to prepare for your ninth baby

So far we’ve bought ___________.

I’ve washed ________.

We got ______ out of storage.

We cleaned ________ and _________.

The baby’s name is _________.

In other words, we’ve done nothing. The closest I’ve come to nesting for Mr. Baby is seriously considering buying this onesie. But I didn’t buy it. I […]

How to paint your toenails while hugely pregnant

Ladies who are very pregnant in the winter are lucky. They can stuff their swollen tootsies into boots and slippers when out and about. The state of toes is only known to a select few people, like a spouse and the entire labor and delivery department. At that point, nobody is looking at her toes […]