Ancient History

Follow Me?


Hanging on to my heels

I wrote this status update at Facebook:

This status update brought to you by Hulk Gretchen. Me still on bedrest. Me watery stuff still low but baby no come because not low enuf which good news but mean Gretchen got to watch moar Everybody Loves Raymond on da Netflix for lots moar dayz and dayz. Me go back Thursday to get goo on belly. Me assured me only have to do dis THREE moar weeks at da most and me like, “WUH?” and smash two passing taxicabs together. Not sorry! So me must wrastle wif what’s best for da baby, da hospital rulez, and me need to not be in dis dumb bed. Ok, the veins and my neck are going down and I’m not so green. Anyway, there’s the scoop.

I’ve been so hopeful I’d be released from bedrest. Even modified bedrest would be okay. Short trips out of the house are approved under modified (as long as you don’t drive), but I’m at the point I can’t even walk to my mailbox.

My husband and I were in the waiting room at my OB’s office. I was exhausted. For some reason, when you rest 24/7 it’s hard to get actual rest. Sleep isn’t something that comes easily to one who lounges around in bed eating crackers and watching bad sitcoms on Netflix. Sleep doesn’t come easily when you have no idea if the morning will bring news of continued bedrest or news you are having a baby. I was tired.

“I am so tired…” I moaned.

He asked if I was physically tired? Yes. Mentally tired? Yes. Spiritually tired? Yes. Emotionally tired? Yes.

And then he asked one more question:

Are the backs of your heels tired?

I took his question seriously. I considered my feet. They were hanging out in my pink Mary Janes. I focused all my attention on how they felt at that very moment. Fine. There. Oblivious. Awake.

I guess that’s something and I guess that’s everything. No matter what is swirling around us, there are small spots of steady peace if we only look for them.

You have no idea how much real rest I found in that truth. Rest doesn’t just come from sleep or spending days, weeks in bed. It comes when your heart and soul are settled and quieted, when focus swings from what is wrong to what is right. There are no insignificant rights. Two heels in pink shoes?

I’ll hang on to them.

4 comments to Hanging on to my heels

  • Heather

    I will have to remember this next time I am on bed rest. I have been on bed rest with four of my pregnancies, the longest bed rest being seven months. My last baby disn’t make it to term, and that really helped me put things in perspective, too. No one has ever been pregnant forever…

  • Amy

    This was just what I needed to read. I haven’t had peace today because I’ve been focused on the one thing that is wrong. Thanks for reminding me to remember all if the many things that are right. It’s such a simple thing, but what a big difference it makes.

    May you find many more spots of steady peace.

  • I think of you every day, friend, and I know this must be so hard for you. And I echo Amy’s words: May your days be filled with more peace…from the tips of your fingers to the soles of your pretty pink shoe clad feet.

  • love it — and now i shall check my heels

Leave a Reply

You can use these HTML tags

<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>