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Practically perfect

Veronica at Toddled Dredge wrote about things she fantasizes about—all G-rated. Basically, she talks about things unattainable in this world. Daydream things.

1. My chronic daydream is to be Mary Poppins—I’d love to have her skills. Sigh…to zip right up the bannister with a basket of laundry folded by my authoritative snap? What a talent. All the Jolly Holidays, tea on the ceiling with requisite hilarity, bright spoons brimming with strawberry cordial, and rooftop galavanting! The ability to pull whatever I need from a ratty carpet bag. In fact, in December 2004 I wrote an entire post about my desire to be Mommy Poppins.

2. When I was a kid, I wished I could go Walnut Grove, visit the Ingalls family, then give them a car. Life would be easier if they only had a car.

3. I wish I could set off a Lysol bomb in my house as needed. Again, I wrote about this before:

Pull the pin, drop in your home’s hallway, and run to a resort for a few days. Return to a bacterial blank-slate. Immediately repopulate home with germs from the indoor pool and that Waldorf salad you had for dinner 24 hours earlier. Luckily, Lysol Bombs come in a convenient 2-pack. Look for the coupon in this Sunday’s paper

4. Ripping off the same post, I wish my kids had crayons fortified with vitamins, calcium, and iron. If the little ones want to eat crayons, it would be nice to get more out of the experience than technicolored poos. Same with Playdoh.

5. I wish I had a food processor that forms every food into the shape, color, taste, and texture of a McDonald’s Chicken McNugget while maintaining the integrity of the original food’s nutritious value. from that same post…some dreams never die

6. Like Veronica, I’d love to be able to quilt. I’d like to learn to knit, too, and be able to decorate cakes that don’t look like they were dropped out of a hot air balloon.

7. I fantasize about having hardwood floors with the warmth and texture of deep, silky carpet under my bare feet. I realize this is utterly impossible.

5 comments to Practically perfect

  • Excellent. Does the lysol bomb come in different scents?

  • Those are some GOOD dreams. Especially the last. A hardwood floor that felt like a silky carpet but was as easy to clean as a hardwood floor? Dreamy.

  • Amy

    This cracked me up! I could really use the lysol bomb right about now!
    (found you through creaturebug)

  • The lysol bomb is a classic.

  • I too have a dream. I dream of having the ability to slow down or speed up time. It seems like everything would be lovely if I could only do that. Just think: something bad is about to happen, and whooooaaaa . . . . I slow it down in time to prevent it. I need more sleep and ahhhh, I extend those hours in which the baby is actually asleep. So many examples I could give . . . I have my students write about the superpower they’d like to have every year. This one always tops them all.

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