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Beatrix Bobs Her Hair

“Beatrix Bobs Her Hair” is a short story by F. Scott Fitzgerald about a wild toddler girl named Beatrix whose mother becomes aggravated by persnickety tangles and dried yogurt globules in the young child’s hair. The mom impetuously phones a local childrens’ hair cutting establishment with the warning they’ll be there in 45 minutes, have a Sesame Street DVD poised to spin.

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Beatrix does well sitting in the fire engine, ringing the bell and stealing peeks at herself in the mirror. It was her first major hair cutting experience, aside from a bang trim ate age 13 months. As a reward for her good behavior, she is allowed to chose a lollipop from a large basket. She picks popcorn butterscotch (?) flavored, which is nauseating to anyone over the age of eight. Dum-Dumholics don’t mind, and if allowed they’ll even eat the cream soda flavored ones, too.

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The hair, which first sprouted when Beatrix was in utero, is left behind on the salon floor, to be swept into a pile and eventually disposed with the hair of other small children whose mothers may or may not have gotten a little misty at the sight of all that pretty, pretty baby hair eternally separated from a dear little noggin.

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Once home, Beatrix’s family notes she looks much older and somehow taller.

The theme of Fitzgerald’s story is the long-haired are very different from you and me. That, and you can’t entirely trust a girl with a bob.

She will still get food in her hair.

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